Horrible Love Poems

And Now's It's Time for Horrible Love Poems with Mi and De, the Part of the Blog Where Mi and De Come Out and Write Horrible Love Poems




Heart Throb

Oh baby my heart beats like a drum
Every time I touch your bum
I know my way with words is slick
Do you wanna come and touch my stick

... ~ ...

Void

Hey you the one with the face
Do you mind if I come and fill your space

... ~ ...

98.65 Degrees

The skin of yours makes my skin warm
And that is why it is irresistible

The breath of yours makes my skin warm
And that is why it is irresistible

That is why you should go out with me

You are hot
I am cold

... ~ ...

Ode to You

You are the starlight to my moonshine
You are the summer of my mind
You can complete a perfect square
And still make jocks stop and stare

My heart goes boom

You can make a perfect sandwich
If you want to
Baby I won't force you
But please don't lay on that mayonaisse
Unless you want to

My stomach has room

You are so beautiful
Make me a sandwich

... ~ ...


(Failed couplet, [and coupling])

Oh hey baby did I mention you are the world
It's kinda ironic though cause you're not round

... ~ ...

Oh the Sky

The sky has stars
You are a star
In my sky you are
Please don't go baby
 And twinkle
Away from me
Baby baby baby
You are bright
Like a 60 watt light bulb
Incandescent

... ~ ...

Fewer and Farther

The times you make me tingle
 Are few and far between

The time I make you single
 Is shortly to be seen

... ~ ...

I Could Write a Longer Poem if My PEN Didn't IS

HeY BaBy YoU StIlL UP
BoOty CaLl
TeLl HeNrY I sAiD SUP

... ~ ...

Lemme Throw Some Coal In Ya

You
You are
You are the engine
You are the engine to my heart
My heart cannot run
My heart cannot
My heart
My

... ~ ...

Da Illest

Call me Mr. Suave muffin
Cause I'll have you puffin'
Give me a shout out and yell out
HOLY STAG
Cause baby, "me and you"
 This shit's in the bag

... ~ ...

Hi, we are having sex, but I couldn't resist to write you a poem

Hey baby girl is this sinning
Cause me and Sheen call this #WINNING

... ~ ...

Law of Divine

You heart triangulates the essence of my existance
I can see your angles but I can't read your sine
Let me stop guessing and grant me acquiesance
Oh starstruck lover will you be mine?

... ~ ...

The Limit as Zoom Approaches Infinity

From behind these 'noculars
You look so spectocular
A dream of mine
O girl it's most divine
Includes you from dawn til close
What's that you got on your nose

... ~ ...

Catch You if I Can

Six months it has been*
Since you were last seen
I have searched under leaves
For miles, feet, and leagues

So

Don't laugh if I fail
For you are a snail**

*Been here pronounced the British way
(Insert whale for max ridiculi)

... ~ ...

Oh honey
Oh baby
You make me tingle
With rage
I'll kill you in your sleep

... ~ ...

I open the window
I breath the outside air in
You smell so bad

... ~ ...

You are my whole universe
Actually
You are my world
Actually
Your are my planet's core
You are my source of gravity
You bring me down
Whore

... ~ ...

Oh Baby
by Justin Bieber (after he gets Selena Gomez pregnant and marries her) 

Oh baby
Oh baby
You are my life
Except when I'm home with my children and wife

... ~ ...

Planets Align

I'm your Mars
You are my Venus
You are my vagina
I am your penis

-DeMi

A Discourse on Neglect

Neglect is a horrible thing. It affects millions of "things" every day. 'Things' here is used in its loosest form. Alas, in older blogs I would go on a discourse on the many word associations of that last sentence. So for good times sake.

THINGS IS A WHORE!
or if you prefer
THINGS JUST STRETCHED! yawn

Not quite a discourse, but it would be interesting if that were the traditional method for such things.

Let's take Renee Descartes' Discourse on Method. It would read, quite simply:

COGITO ERGO SUM [BITCH]! The full discourse can be found here. your welcome.

or the classic Communist Manifesto by the sirs Marx and Engels can be simply stated:

I AM PROLE, HEAR ME...whimper. here

And as school rears its head once more, don't we all wish our papers could be condensed to such few words?
Yeah the promotion of laziness is the elevation of future-sorrow..blah blah blah

As coming full circle is a specialty of mine, I will end with this:

Neglect things responsibly, or else things might give you HIV, and you will die. Most certainly.
or rather...

NEGLECT=HIV

Happy Saturday!
-Mi