Top 10 Non-Sexual Ways to Please Yo Guurl This Valentine's Day
10) Have non-sex. Cuddle. Then cuddle some more.
9) Take a grenade for her...
8) Role play with her, but with the sole intent of being charades champs at the next couples' night.
7) Write her a poem; take any of these as a template! Love Poems!
6) Save flowers,. plant (her) a rosebush.
5) Compliment her, wear some earrings that match her dress.
4) Buy a chocolate factory and give her a golden ticket.
3) Get her oven warmed up, turn on her stove, butter her muffin...and make her dinner.
2) Go out dancing, leave room for Jesus, Buddha, Confucius, Mohammed, Ganesha, and well just dance.
1) Serenade her, but DO NOT marinade her.
Or perhaps you can think of other non-sexual, yet titillating, things yo gurl would enjoy.
And MoT Nation, here is a bonus list! Consider it our Valentine's Day gift to you! Cause well,
"You're Awesome"
Top 10 Ways to Not Have Sex on Valentine's Day
10) Turn on as many lights as possible.
9) Keep talking about how bloated you are.
8) Be yourself.
7) Get yourself fitted for a chastity belt.
6) Go to jail...wait nevermind.
6) Witness to her/him, make sure to include literature.
5) End every story with "and that's the way the cookie crumbles".
4) Eunuchize!
3) Constantly assure him/her you don't have an STD.
2) Take your toupee/wig off and comb it. Like so.
1) Wear suspenders, Urkelize!
9) Keep talking about how bloated you are.
8) Be yourself.
7) Get yourself fitted for a chastity belt.
6) Witness to her/him, make sure to include literature.
5) End every story with "and that's the way the cookie crumbles".
4) Eunuchize!
3) Constantly assure him/her you don't have an STD.
2) Take your toupee/wig off and comb it. Like so.
1) Wear suspenders, Urkelize!
-DeMi
No comments:
Post a Comment
Please! It's quite bare down here!