Top 10 Weighs too Annoy You're english Teacher
(Sorry Ms. Phillips)
10) Write your papers in a foreign language.(Sorry Ms. Phillips)
9) Create your own verb tense and insist on it's use.
8) Write your sentences from right to left. When asked about this, which you will be, be prepared to be a native of any Arabic, Hebrew, Chinese or Japanese speaking country.
7) Confuse you're homophones two the point of patency.
6) Call them out on plagiarism when they write specific examples from the novel you're reading on the board.
5) Write an essay explaining how and why your dog ate your essay. A paw print as a citation is a nice touch.
4) Take every opportunity given to correct your teacher grammatically and syntactically. They will pretend to appreciate it, but truthfully, this is their biggest pet-peeve.
3) Argue the existence of Shakespeare and claim that his works were those of many ghost writers under one pen name.
2) When asked to read aloud in class, pause longer than necessary at commas and don't stop at all at periods.
1) Again, when reading aloud, make offhand comments on the author's writing style. Also pose your own questions to the class and be sure to go off on extremely irrelevant tangents.
6) Call them out on plagiarism when they write specific examples from the novel you're reading on the board.
5) Write an essay explaining how and why your dog ate your essay. A paw print as a citation is a nice touch.
4) Take every opportunity given to correct your teacher grammatically and syntactically. They will pretend to appreciate it, but truthfully, this is their biggest pet-peeve.
3) Argue the existence of Shakespeare and claim that his works were those of many ghost writers under one pen name.
2) When asked to read aloud in class, pause longer than necessary at commas and don't stop at all at periods.
1) Again, when reading aloud, make offhand comments on the author's writing style. Also pose your own questions to the class and be sure to go off on extremely irrelevant tangents.
Honourable Mentions
Spell words the British way, yoghurt, flavour, crunchatise, colour and so on. Imagination is a bad thing in spelling, so here is a website to guide you. This should inspire a delightful conversation with your teacher where you can argue you are using English in a more pure form.
When another student answers a question, immediately ask "may I offer a rebuttal?".
Put emoticons in your papers.
When another student answers a question, immediately ask "may I offer a rebuttal?".
Put emoticons in your papers.
How useful! I thoroughly appreciate the British spelling suggestion. It's something with which i struggled to let go of when I moved back and I'm sure I definitely annoyed a few of my teachers with using words such as colour, neighbour, and tyre.
ReplyDeleteI twitched a little every thyme homophones we're confused. Sew eye guess it wood bee an effective tactic.
ReplyDeleteKathryne
http://youveneverseenwhat.blogspot.com/